'From Shepherd to Hero to King (and all points in between): Lessons from the Life of David'

David drops Goliath like a bad habit

No bible study has changed my perspective on God (well, since my conversion studies anyway!) more than my recent readings concerning the life of David, son of Jesse. I have been continually amazed when I look at the events of his life, as chronicled in 1 and 2 Samuel, by the amazing ups and nearly crushing and oft-times gut wrenching downs that he experienced throughout his life. His rise from obscurity as a lowly shepherd boy who was barely even acknowledged by his own dad to his meteoric rise to hero/conqueror of the mighty Goliath, to his ascension to the throne where he became the greatest king in Israel's history; David's life was both triumphant and, somewhat shockingly, tragic. He was anointed, then disappointed. He was chosen, then chased. He was faithful, then fearful. He was righteous, then repugnant.  He was chosen by Samuel and then sent by his dad, who obviously was not impressed, to take cheeses to his brothers. He felled Goliath with a sling shot and some rocks, then was chased out of the palace by the man he was supposed to replace, the murderous king Saul. When Saul was killed, he ascended to the throne, then lusted, raped, murdered, and lied himself into a world of hurt. He repented after the rebuke of the prophet Nathan, but later died a broken and sad man, the victim of his own failed fatherhood. Reading through the account of David's life is a virtual roller coaster ride of emotions that is wrought with cautionary tales as well as stories of epic victory.
What became indelibly written on my heart through this study is how God incredibly loves his people. David was obviously God's chosen man to lead Israel, a man after his own heart. Yet he had some colossal failures. His lies caused the head prophet of Nob, Ahimelek, to compromise his convictions and ultimately the same deceit led to the entire city of Nob being ransacked and destroyed; men, women, and children alike. Years later, his lust, lies, and emotional decision making, reared their ugly head again as he committed adultery with Bethsheba and then had her husband killed. And to top it all off, when David was old and full of years, his lack of parenting came back to haunt him as his sons took his kingdom from him and left him with nothing. The failures David endured were all self-inflicted and some of them ended the lives of innocent people, BUT nevertheless, God held David in the highest esteem. Why? Why would he choose such a 'royal' screw-up to be his man? Why would choose an emotional, lustful, deceitful, arrogant, young, punk from the shepherd fields to be his man? This whole study on David brought me to one very encouraging and securing conclusion. Now hold on tight for this one...this could revolutionize your faith if you let it.
God is not as concerned with my ups and downs as much he is with the relationship I have with him. Did you catch that? Stop for a second and let that sink in. It's not so much the snap shot, but the motion picture. Look at how David always recovered. He always went back to his relationship with God even after he blew it big time. He went extended periods of time where he was 'in sin' and yet his repentance was honored by God, even when David was punished severely. He won many victories for the Lord but those didn't really shape God's opinion of him that much either. It was David's love for God, his persistence in going back to Him, that defined David's life and was the  preeminent reason why God held David in such high esteem.
I feel a cosmic connection with David. No, not because I was ever royalty, or because I ever felled the big bully, but because I feel like my life is a roller-coaster. Ups, downs, twists, turns, drops, slow crawls, and dramatic speeds seem to characterize my daily life. Like David, I have blown it big time in my life and I have also been blessed beyond reason. I have made some bad choices and broken faith with the Lord to follow my own feelings. I have stood firm in the face of some challenges and have wilted under others. I can totally relate to the highs and lows David experienced and how his story almost seems like the tale of 5 or 6 men's lives woven together, rather than one man's saga. What can be incredibly challenging for me in all of this is, is that I spend too much time trying to weigh my life on scales that are concerned with victories and defeats. I have this almost constant, sneaking feeling that the bad times far outweigh the good. I feel like those times where I wilted make my times where I stood strong worthless, or at the very least, not all that great. I get focused on seeing my life through the lens of victories and defeats, good times and bad times, and because I am an eternal pessimist, my life looks pretty bleak. I get depressed, hopeless, and suffer from a serious lack of joy in the Lord. My peace is in pieces and faith is smaller that a molecule, not even perceptible to the human eye. To my shame, I can get so caught up in all of that that I miss the overarching point. However, the back story that was the constant thread that runs through the story of David's life....none of that matters as much as my relationship with God. My wins and loses don't matter as much as my heart to get back in the game when I get spiritually concussed. It's not my performance, it's my perseverance that matters. I have to go back to Him when I stray. I have to go back to Him when I realize I have been pushing Him away. I have to embrace Him instead of embracing my fear, my embarrassment, or my pride. Too often I sin, get filled with guilt, then turn away from God in my disgrace. When I should be turning to Him in my hour of need, I am declaring in my heart like Peter in the boat during the biggest catch of his life, 'Go away from me Lord, for I am a sinful man.'
Too many of us are paralyzed by perspective. We look at life as a series of tests that are graded by "pass" or "fail". Far too many of us measure our lives by the number of victories we have, thinking that somehow if we get a high enough victory to defeat ratio that God with let us in, because, after all, God only wants winners, right? Well guess what? God isn't that short-sighted. He wants us to have victories and he knows we will have defeats, but in the end, the number or even the breadth of those, won't matter a bit. All that will matter is did you give you heart to Him? Did you come back when you strayed? Did you repent, confess, and accept His discipline? Did you persevere, getting up when you got knocked down? Did you, despite your flaws, fight and claw for your relationship with God until your last breath? It's all about your relationship with the Almighty. As it was with David, so it is with you. To God we must go and to Him we must stay and in the end that's how it will be, for eternity. Amen!